Jaakko's Theorem : Being shot at is good as it successfully draws away enemy fire.
Vesa's Corollary to Jaakko's Theorem: Machineguns kill.
The Turk's Law: The losers of two world wars actually had every advantage.
Vaclav's Hypothesis: Being on the losing side of history can be countered with iron discipline.
Erkki's Paradox: Those without orders demand them. Those with orders, ignore them.
Luukas' Corollary to the Erkki Paradox: Commanding is best done when isolated on a flank.
Pith's Law: Being 35 miles behind the front line is no guarantor of safety.
The Sniper Obfuscation: Sniping declared ability has an inverse relationship with sniping actual ability.
The Viking's Declaration: Kill them all, and glory to the brave.
Samantha's Law: Nurses only die if they are in love.
Wallace's Law: Soldiers only survive the war if their true love has been carbonised to ash by Fritz's flamethrower within line of sight.
Toure's Paradox: The better the starting XP, the lower the lifespan.
Janoslaw's Dilemma : If you never take a wound that isn't fatal, you'll never be recuperating in hospital and be in action more frequently.
Topi's Hypothesis: It's perfectly OK to go into battle when you should be in a hospital bed, as half severed limbs and collapsed lungs are mere flesh wounds.
Emerson's Corollary: War kills. Again. And again. And again. And aga…
Turk's Rule: It's more PC to talk shit about a Turk then a Yank.
Lesina's Proposal: Many things are dangerous, angry medics are deadly.
Asche's Revenge: Hand wounds. Many of them. Get one and they keep coming.