Woods' Last Letter

Dear Mom and Dad,

If this reaches you, odds are I've gone to find out the truth about what happens when you die. I can only hope they don't mind I was a bit sketchy on the details of how things worked. I tried to be nice to people, and I thought Jesus was a good guy. I wish I'd have written more, but the mail here is as regular as … well, it's not. Not really. I wanted to tell you all about my parrots and things. They're great birds! I hope I can take them home. If not, I hope they've found good homes. If I've passed on, I am sure people will watch out for them.
I don't really have any regrets about serving here. The leeches kind of sucked. So did a lot of things, but I made good friends and enjoyed meeting the natives. I even got to go fishing and wading! It was great. I hope they send the necklace I made back, if not, a nice lady named Annabelle will take care of it, alright?
I learned a lot out here, including how awful people can be to each other. I hope they remember it and don't do it again, you know? I wish I had more poignant or deep thoughts here, but it's hard telling. I mean, here I am sitting and thinking about my last thoughts while not actually having them. I'm sure it'll be something like 'Oh crap' or 'ow that stings'. If I even see it coming anyway… But most of all, I love you guys and I'm glad if I went, I went helping others and protecting someone. Thank you for everything.

With all my love,
Vincent Woods.

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